Bittersweet...

I know what you're thinking, the title and the image doesn't complement each other. Then go, read the post  and find out their connection. ;')

   This post should be something that is really really special and a memorable one. Why? Because this is going to be the last post I'll make here in our division-yes, today's my last day here. 

   Last month, our division chief talked to me. She disclosed a great news. She  told me that I am on the preference list for other position, well, a higher position. They asked me if I wanna give it a try since they're considering me. (My heart jumped when I heard the news, it's indeed a great one right? naging in denial pa nga ako ) I tried and obviously, I was the blessed-chosen one.

   Now it's really official. My heart's melting because I really enjoy being here, being with the most witty yet intellectual people. My 9 months of working with them is really the experience I am thankful for. They are all thoughtful. I had a hard time at first (blame it on the adjustment process) but I must admit when I became accustomed and got comfortable with the work and my workmates, every working day is a fun-filled day. I really enjoy exchanging conversations with them, aside from they can make me laugh, I'm gaining knowledge as well. This is probably my close to dream work setting.

   Today, again, I'm having a hard time but this time, it's because I'm leaving the division and workmates I fell in love with. I'm calming myself since this isn't going to be a goodbye. In fact, I will be just a building away. I'll still be seeing them. I know I shouldn't feel bad, I should be happy (of course, I am), it's the beginning of better things that will come along. I'm truly blessed. I can now exclaim that I am a PHilMech employee. Hard work pays off especially if you're in God's side.

Let me end this post by sharing this:

With God on your side, you cannot possibly lose. He can supernaturally turn your dreams into reality.

God heals and provides; He does great things!

Yes, I'm in the mood of making a note!

My mom had a mild stroke last December 18 which is the cause of her hemiplegia (paralysis of half of the body; leg, arm and trunk).  During that situation, I am certain that we are not yet ready for a life without our mom though something inside me says "Do not worry, she'll get better". I prayed ceaselessly because I know my God won't turn me down. What happened to my mom proved us how blessed  we are for having a kind-hearted and thoughtful mom. A lot of people prayed, visited and helped her. She really made good friends. We were also blessed because we got to celebrate new year at our house although we spent our Christmas at the hospital. Well, celebrating Christmas there didn't made me feel sad. What's important for me is  we are complete, we have each other, we knew we have a lot to count on, we experienced the goodness of God and that's the true meaning of Christmas. 

-This has been in my drafts (in tumblr) for a year, I guess. (I only get the chance to edit and post it today tapos baka mgtampo pa tumblr followers ko dahil late na nga nirepost ko pa dito) My mom is still in her recovery process. She now can walk but still needs our assistance in doing other things. 

Seeing my mom inside an intensive care unit, almost lifeless is the worst nightmare I don't wanna happen again -We almost lost her. This instance made me love her more, appreciate her efforts and value the privilege to be with her and take care of her. Now, her capabilities maybe limited but her presence is enough for us to keep going and be inspired. 

Believe me, you wouldn't want to have regrets when the time comes that everything is too late and what you have are just "what ifs&if onlys"  and you cannot do anything to change it. You can have plenty of friends and relatives but you'll never have another mom. In our lives we are only given one mother who will do everything for us and who will love us more than our capabilities and beyond our shortcomings. So, tell your mom you love her , show her!

A Blessed Lady

I know not all of you know that I came from a broken family. My father  left us almost 7 years ago. That particular event wounded our heart and of course, the scar is still there.

                We’re all affected with what had happened in different ways. My sister took the responsibility to work for us though she should be enjoying her salary in buying what she wants instead of saving it for our bills and needs. My brother quit schooling and never had the thought to go back. My mom once become devastated and almost lost her mind due to finding ways to contact our father.  And I, planted anger in my heart and promised myself that I will make everything to make my father regret what he has done to us.

                Since Filipinos are known for being resilient, we bounced back and somehow get over with what happened though the issue was still sensitive for us. I have lots of questions in my mind which I tried asking my father but none of them were answered. As we stand strong, we learned not to focus on the most difficult crisis a family could face. We witnessed God’s faithfulness and the fulfillment of His promise. He never left us. He blessed us more and made our hearts braver. He sparkled us the hopes we need to face tomorrow. He touched others heart which made the absence of my father became the window for others to show their love and concern for us.

                Now, I already finished college, currently working and still, I don’t have the father whom I can share this milestone. But I am no longer sorry about it because I  am certain that a lot of people are proud of my accomplishments. They believed in me. They took care of me. They loved me-enough reason to stay with us. I lose one man in my life but God blessed me with countless gentlemen in my life. And they're all the reason behind my happiness and gratefulness(aside from my mom).

              Remember, you always have a choice. You can take the path of a wasted soul and be rebellious OR let it inspire you, stand strong, and tell the world nothing can knock you and your dreams down. Life is a matter of perspective.  It’s okay to feel bad but don’t forget to take a step closer to your dreams as you feel God’s glory.

Yes, I’m blessed to be surrounded by loving, caring and thoughtful people.

A birthday message to the most down to earth and real person I know, Mary Jane Castro

Happy Happy birthday! Thank you for letting me be part of your life though we haven't met personally and our communication is only  through text and social media. Thank you for the trust. From the first time I dropped into your fb profile, I knew already that you're kind-hearted and our personality will jive well. I was the happiest when you replied in tumblr, atleast I'm no longer an "unknown reader" or cge na nga a "stalker" (haha) and now I don't have to wait for your posts because you're personally  sharing not just your "story of the day" but even your secret and hard-to-disclose experiences (I guess. hehe), so from the bottom of my heart,  thank you! I am/will always be your genuine and proud friend. Just want you to know that I  can't afford to lose this friendship. I'm always here for you! I'll be here to cheer you up when you're feeling down, encourage you whenever you're in despair, giggle with you, listen to your interesting stories and of course, be one of the people to say kudos for each achievement you're going to have. Happy birthday again! Enjoy your day! Have a blast! I love you, deeply and sincerely. You'll always be in my prayer. God bless you! We'll see each other, soon! mwahness!

If you truly love someone, you will give her  more than what she deserves. -Joyce

11-15-2012

11-15-2012: Today is our 44th month as a couple. I can’t believe we’ve made it to our 3yrs and 8mos in this relationship. At first, I, honestly have this belief that we won’t make it to our 4th month but look how far we’ve gone. That’s why I’m really proud of this relationship. It isn’t perfect. Yes, we do fight, argue, and all the things that put our relationship to a test. Whether you're in a long-distance relationship or not,  to have long-term relationship isn’t given. It's something you have to work hard for. It’s a long process that requires two people to COMMIT  their support, respect, effort, long patience, understanding, love and to EMBRACE each flaws, shortcomings, beliefs, and thoughts.
As long as you decide to be stronger and tighter than the struggles you’re meeting along your way-everyday, then you are. As simple as that.

So we’re here now. STRONGER, MORE MATURE AND MORE IN LOVE THAN EVER.
PAOLO ANTOLIN, you’re my one true love. ;’>      

                                                                                                                              --Joyce

OPEN LETTER CHALLENGE-A letter to the Head of my faith [JESUS CHRIST]

To my forever DAD AND KING,

     The moment I accepted You as my ONE AND ONLY SAVIOR and THE ONE to take and rule over in my life, no problem is unsolvable, no struggle is unsurpassable, no pain  is unbearable, no fear  is  unconquerable, and no dream  is  unreachable. Truly with You, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!
     Without you, I know life would be unimaginably harsher to me; no genuine happiness, no unconditional love, and of course, there will be no assurance of a wonderful life.
      People may think that I'm not a godly person. But I know for sure, I am making You feel how close I am to You. You're the first One to visit my mind whenever I'm worried, I have a problem, I'm happy and burden-free. I guess no one has the right to question my relationship with You because I know in my heart how deeply I trust and surrender my life to You and how I am touched and moved by Your faithfulness and  warmth.

     I don't know how You manage to listen to billions of people who ask for different things. Perhaps, I will never know how. Thus, thank You for the opportunity to have eternal life and be blessed by You. You never turn your back from me though I have failed you for so many times. You're always willing to grant me your forgiveness even I continue to do the same mistakes. You love me unconditionally though most of the time, I'm not worthy.
     I will forever exclaim that nothing compares to the love You have offered me. I will do my best to be Your submissive servant and living bible.

Your daughter and servant,
Joyce

FIFTEEN: Three Years and Five Months

Happy 41st! Thanks for the loving smiles that warms my heart and lightens my spirit. Hopefully, the next 41st that we're going to celebrate is our 41st wedding anniversary(and beyond). God bless us and our relationship! I love you, my now and forever. :">

"What is stopping you is not lack of inspiration, but lack of trust in your abilities."-Mara Wilson

Sensitivity Matters

I have a fear on spiders. This isn't innate in me. It just happened when I was a kid, one afternoon I [imaginably] heard a spider’s cry and thought the reason was I accidentally sat on it, but I immediately noticed that it was the drowning rat who seeks for help in the pail. Since that day, I dreamt of the giant spiders hunting me. And also since then I have had the so called arachnophobia. (As a psych graduate I have knowledge on how to treat phobias but I don't want to apply it in myself 'cause I know in my heart that I can't handle the fear. This fear might cause [ME] cardiac arrest or mental illness.)

I hate it when people use this weakness as the contrivance to their bully-ness. I loathe how they can still laugh even if they see me crying and chilling because of severe apprehension. In every conversation were a plan of throwing a spider on me where being brought up, whether it’s a joke or not,  my temper changes, uneasiness visits me and paranoia haunts me. And I am not exaggerating.

Simple things you thought is funny can bring discomfort to someone. Respect others despite their strange weaknesses and offer them deep understanding. You’ll never know how much it can affect her behavior/psychologically.

Never forget the golden rule: "Do not do to others what you don’t want others do unto you.”

It was never wrong to think first before you act especially if the outcome is perceptibly terrible.